Happiness is a One Armed Dinosaur

Happiness is a One Armed Dinosaur
Happiness is a One Armed Dinosaur

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Nano-nano-nano!

I am doing Nano this month. For those of you not as geeky as I am, Nano has to do with the fact (is it?) that November is National Novel Writing Month. NA(tional) NO(vel) = Nano.

Um, this would be my second year attempting this, after writing a mere 43 words in 2007. I suppose I should mention that the point of Nano is to have written 50,000 words by midnight, November 30th. Spooooky! And difficult.

Here are a few things I have realized after taking MY ENTIRE DAY OFF to write.

1. My computer does not enjoy being used for such a long period of time. And really, who does? He's like that friend you invite to things because you need a ride. Hello, taking the bus on a Friday night in heels SUCKS.

2. 50,000 words may as well be 235 million kajillion

3. I don't ever update my AWESOME blog.

4. My AWESOME blog seems a lot more AWESOME after living under this 50,000 word pressure.

5. Wine = food

6. 10.5 hours later wine DOES NOT = food

7. I can only take so many breaks to check Facebook before I feel like I am stalking people. I am sorry, You know who you are!

8. I am most likely NOT a writer.

9. I am struggling with the fact that I am out of wine.

10. Why did I decide to do this?

I think that is all I can write for now. Actually, I know that is all I can write for now. And I do apologize for any typos or grammatical errors. I am saving all the good stuff for Nano!

Friday, October 22, 2010

I love cupcakes & I don't hate babies.


I was recently made aware of this monstrosity several days ago. For the love of Jesus Horses PLEASE don't turn the joy of cupcakes into a terrifying pro-life platform. I happen to love cupcakes, and incidentally I don't hate babies, and I LOVE making choices. Patrick and I decided to launch a Pro-Choice Cupcake site. This is our first design.



Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Lights out!

Everything about my new job is awesome. However, as the weeks go by I am beginning to uncover the stresses of my extremely low-stress job. First and foremost; the bathroom. It's down the hall and it requires a key; but that's not the stressful part. The bathroom is lit by motion sensor lights. I love the fact that my building is doing it's part to help Mother Earth, but it's gone a little too far. The sensors don't seem to work for me. I wait until the last possible moment to use the restroom; I wriggle around in my seat, finish every mundane task I can think of and then walk cross-legged down the hall to....the bathroom. After wrestling to unlock the door (because it weighs a much as a baby Triceratops) I stumble into pitch blackness, completely disoriented and frantic. I violently jerk toward the direction of the stall, hoping that my uncontrollable spastic movements will trigger the sensor, but to no avail. The darkness is not calming, nor relaxing. It is not peaceful or meditative. It is terrifying and I hate it. It is only when I have grown accustomed to the blackness and am washing my hands that the sensor deems me worthy enough to bathe me in light. That is when I shudder in horror at my image in the Texas-sized mirror; shrunken pupils-recoiling from the light, eyes darting back and forth in anticipation of an attack.

When I have returned to the safety of my desk I start to ponder the ups and downs of The Stadium Pal. It just may be worth it.